HOWTO camp as a Point Rat

The Point Rat will generally hang out on the South Side of the Point of the Mountain, car camping. Although he may start with a tent, placed strategically close to the vehicle, he quickly realizes that this is not the most efficient way to camp. The tent is most likely some tropical-climate-rated breeze bag that's incredibly efficient at channeling the relentless chill wind, ensuring he's a shivering carcass all night long.

It also doesn't help matters when the groggy Point Rat, hustling to break camp, encounters the early-bird BMW-driving mortgage-owning haters--who eager for a dawn break session--radiate their frustration at him for the recently degraded soaring conditions. Whew. No, tent camping here is not good.

So since necessity is the mother of invention, and also because the Point Rat would be loathe to pay good money for even a cheap motel room, much less a polar expedition-quality tent, he merely moves his sleeping quarters into the vehicle. Bust down the back seats and create a layered nest. First put that inflatable camprest cross-wise to smooth out the seat joint, then layer on top a Sprawlmart-special semi-inflated inflatable mattress, then add the sandwich of greasy fartsacks. Nestled inside the bags, this can actually be quite comfortable, even with an economy car, as long as the Point Rat is no taller than say 6'0".

Now for obvious reasons, the Point Rat should remember to leave his leaky propane bottles outside the hermetically sealed vehicle during the overnight. But next morning, break down is a non-event and the eager beaver P2s just look expectantly at the Point Rat to be the first wind dummy! Hey buddy, do you think it's good?

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The Point Rat's camp stove jockeying is initially quite unskillful, as he tries to light and cook out in the howling wind wasting way too much propane for each meal. Eventually he will realize that the driver's side foot well is a far more sheltered and efficient place to do the cooking, as long as he pays strict attention. The rental car agency will appreciate singed seats or a melted steering wheel.

Living in the semi-desert environment will lead the Point Rat to conserve his drinking water, refusing to use it for cleaning. This is good. However cleaning the cooking utensils at the local coffee shop restroom will not earn the Point Rat any brownie points. He will eventually figure out one of the unspoken rules of no-budget car camping, reuse that processed drinking water!

Combined with a bit of biodegradable dish soap, and some camp stove heating, the Point Rat will find it works fairly well. And the most hardcore Point Rat will wash off the soapy residue in the same fashion, then slosh it around before flinging it. This technique is a godsend for him at night too. The Point Rat will find it is far more comfortable to relieve himself in the pot and pour it out the car door. It sure beats positioning himself at the cusp of the vehicle in the bracing night breeze and aiming low, hoping for no blowback.

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As mentioned previously, the Point Rat will usually not be spending much on food or lodging, but could very well have the bro-deal on the latest gear. In fact it behooves the Point Rat to try and get this on anything and everything gear/instruction related. He can work his debt off, or max-it off on his still technically valid credit cards.

The conscientious Point Rat will also offer to pay for his host's brews and meals in payment for pad-crashing and showering after late-night drinking sessions^w^w instructor studying when it's too late to drive back to the Point. The host was most likely a Point Rat himself previously, and thus the cycle repeats...

So my Utah trip is nearly completed, having successfully finished the paragliding instructor training course. And as you've read, I've learned quite a lot more from the Point Rat too! He recommended splurging on a $4 campground shower, Hollywood style, the night before my airline flight back to tropical civilization...